Medical Marijuana....

I guess this little guy, Owen, was always really athletic until doctors told him he had bone cancer in one of his legs. After having the leg amputated, the guy was always in a lot of pain and couldn't hold down food without vomiting. No prescribed drugs seemed to help him out. Finally, a doctor named Charlie Lynch prescribed him Medical Marijuana, which is legal in California. The kid got better.

Charlie Lynch now could face 100 years in prison.

This is beyond our usual toolbox of words like staggering, stunning etc,.

Welcome to the freak show.

America: The Greatest Show On Earth!

All I have to say is that P.T. Barnum would be proud:



If the F-word is evil, I wonder where he ranks the word ''cunt?'' Cunt, cunt, cunt. Just wanted to ensure my place in hell.

The Devil's Sacraments

So I went to see the Dark Knight at an Imax theater. I'd reserved tickets online 3 days before. Then we got to the theater and drove around in the parking lot for 15 minutes until we found a fucking spot.

Then we got inside and immediately I was REVOLTED by the horrifying god-awful stench that was so fucking thick I felt like I was swimming in a huge fucking tub of lard. This ginormous ass stadium was bulging at the seams with beached whales shoving godzilla splooge amounts of pop-corn in their mouths with fire hydrant intensity and maybe 40 percent accuracy. The sound was so fucking loud, it sounded like Hitler's army marching on eggshells. Then after the crunch crunch smack smack from the popcorn comes the sickening repugnant sluuuuuurrrpp from the fucking SUPER TANKER of coke that they hold in their laps cause it's too fuckin big to put in the cup holder.

Me and Jamie didn't even say a word to each other, we walked out immediately and exchanged our tickets for a later date. There were no two adjacent seats available, but that was actually a minor detail...I fucking abhor popcorn. Wasn't about to let my first Imax experience be shat on by a bunch of fat motherfuckers who should've had a bite to eat before leaving the house.

One day when I'm a millionaire I will start my own theater (cinema), and food of ANY KIND will be absolutely and strictly forbidden. I'm looking forward to seeing the rest of you cynical motherfuckers there. :)

Heath Ledger Tribute??

I thought I'd heard that there was to be some tribute to Heath Ledger at the end of the credits. Guess I miss read it. Still, how fucking misleading that it's all over the news ''tribute in Dark Knight credits to Ledger!'' Then I sat allllll the way through the credits holding in a MAJOR piss, just to realize that I had already seen the tribute. It was just the words ''in memory of Heath Ledger'' and some other guy. Yup, that's right, Ledger didn't even get the tribute all to himself, he had to share it. Heath did a pretty fucking good job, so I was looking forward to see a documentary type thing at the end talking about what a cool guy he was. But, nope.

I feel duped.

The joker was really outsanding, though. Heath Ledger ruled.

Katy Perry sucks, the rest of you are sickos

I want to applaud 7% percent of our audience because you indeed hate Katy Perry as much as we do.

However, the rest of you are sickos. Giles Marini cock? Michael Angarano nude? Ew, he's pre-pubescent.

Be careful, we are watching you .... muahahahahah

Lindsay .... Lesbian?!

I am sick of all these media outlets going on about how Lindsay Lohan is a ... dun dun da ... LESBIAN! O my goodness, lesbian? What could that be? Shield my eyes! Give me a fuckin break.

Why is this a breaking story? According to this, Lindsay's poor heart is being broken because her mother refuses to acknowledge her relationship with Samantha Ronson. O please, both of her parents are wackjobs and I am sure she knows this by now and does not want/need their approval.

So cunt you, media outlets, for acting like being gay/lesbian is taboo when really you just want to sell more copies of your magazines.

Billboard Top 100

Astonishing, stupefying, dumbfounding and....STAGGERING.

The Ever Redundant Madden

For some odd reason we keep getting lots of viewers on this site, and even some emails. We've got fans. Granted, you are all probably a bunch of cynical, misanthrope amoral pricks if you're reading this blog, but I still love you. That's why I keep making posts.

I'm going to see Batman today, but I won't spoil it for you just yet...I'll wait a week or two. I think I'm pretty contrary as a person, because anytime I hear people heaping praise on something, I want to rip it apart. However, I did read an article that said Javier Barfem's performance in "No Country for Old Men'' was better than Ledger's in the new Batman. Thanks to that writer, I will probably like the new Batman (I hate Javier Barfem.)

Anyway since My Xbox 360 will be back soon from the Microsoft repair service, I've been looking into which game to get. The last version of Madden I got was the '06. Probably time to update.

Looking at the screenshots, though, they still overlooked one thing:


The fans still look amazingly 2D. The first pic is from Madden 05, and the second from 09. Maybe it's lame, but every year I keep crossing my fingers hoping the next Madden will feature bad-ass sidelines and fans. The gameplay never fuckin changes, so they may as well put a bunch of beer drinking, fat ass belly hanging out 3D fans in the stands, and maybe if you get close enough you can hear 'em belting out cuss words. Now THAT is a Madden I would certainly buy. It'd be so realistic.

Old Fart Kicks a Harmless Pissing Chick

Talk about failing to appreciate the finer things in life. Obviously this uncultured swine has never been to Mardi Gras. Doesn't know a fine piece of art when he sees it.

The old fart walks right out of the grocery store and sees a chick pissing on the sidewalk. With her tits hanging out, nonetheless. Most old guys would be happy to see such a thing. It is certainly something you don't see every day! I think it would be a nice change from the mundane day to day norm. But what does he do? He kicks her in the ass. What a dumb shit. She may be a public pisser, but he's a party pooper!


You know hes still going to have a wank on that bus while thinking about her and smelling her piss on his shoe.

Angelina is not a Phenomenon

As we have stated in this post and this post, we hate Angelina. Why is it when I go to latest headlines, the second one is Angelina gave birth to twins, blah blah. Last time I checked giving birth isn't a world event. Women give birth to children every day, why does it matter that she is giving birth?! Why is everyone so obsessed with her anyway? I don't understand the appeal.

Exhibit A:



This picture scares the shit out of me. I don't fucking get it. Why am I supposed to give a flying fuck that shes having twins? Why is breaking news? Ugh. CUNT YOU ANGELINA and your fucking media circus!!!

A Load of Shit

Don't you just love those celebrities who go around touting their humanitarianism by hopping on their private jets and getting their pictures taken with some skinny kids in Africa? That's just so beautiful. Then they get a press interview immediately afterward and go ''Africa is in bad shape.'' No shit.

I just plain don't fucking buy it. It's just a trend...a bunch of self-important, ego-boosting, empty conspicuous BULLSHIT. I say conspicuous cause I highly doubt they would do it if nobody was watching them, which a ton of people sadly fucking are.

I don't mean to really pick on Ben Affleck, I just saw this article in the news and I got to thinking. If all these celebrities love kids so much, why not adopt one from the States? Hmmm? "Angelina Jolie just adopted a child from East Saint Louis.'' I guess that just doesn't have the heroic, epic/romantic ring to it that Africa does. It doesn't sound quite as noble as saving a kid from the depths of a third world country. Too bad for the little shits who are abandoned in East Saint Louis, eh?

That's what's so sickening about it. People like Madonna, Paris Hilton, Angelina Jolie, Meg Ryan...as soon as they get their little popularity boosts and the adoption fad is over, and they move on to something else like adopting sea turtles, it's going to be right back to ''fuck you, African kids!'' Which is a shame, cause we all know adopting ONE fucking child is the answer to all Africa's problems.


Cunt you, self important, pretentious exploiting fucks!